Monday to Sunday. Mornings and evenings. Non-stop.
I was running my own businesses: a restaurant, a dark kitchen supplying supermarkets and others, a catering company, and a food production company of our own. I never switched off. I trained, but I was always a little chubby, and I never understood why. I slept too little and woke up tired. I drank. I smoked. I used drugs, sometimes from Thursday until Monday. From the outside it looked like I had it all figured out. I made good money, and I honestly believed I could live like this forever.
The truth was different. I was burned out, and I didn't feel good in my own skin. I was always searching for something that wasn't there. My brain needed stimulation, so I lived on the edge, and I hurt people along the way. I broke relationships, and that was my fault.
Then COVID hit.
Almost overnight, our revenue was gone. I had to change everything. The work disappeared, and so did the parties. And something I didn't expect happened: I started to feel better.
So I cut it all out. I closed everything down and became a trainer.
The first year, I earned almost nothing. I taught group classes at the Zuidas and cleaned gym equipment. I could just about pay my rent, and nothing else. But for the first time in years, I was doing something I loved, and I was working on myself, mentally and physically.
Every resource I had went into education, here in the Netherlands and abroad. I didn't want to be just another trainer. I wanted to truly understand how the body works, and how people change.
It wasn't until last year that I found out I'm on the spectrum. Suddenly, everything made sense. My brain had always been hungry for stimulation, and I kept feeding it in the wrong places. Now I feed it by learning and by discovering new things, and it gives me everything the edge never did.
I feel better than I ever have, and I want everyone to feel that way.
That's why I coach busy men who already train. I know exactly what it's like to work non-stop, put in the effort, and still not be where you want to be. I've been there, and I know the answer isn't more effort. It's a better process.
TimothyCoach, Amsterdam